The air grows cold and my skin prickles up into gross-looking bumps,
causing my whole body to shiver and shake as I try to stay still in this brick-hard chair.
This chair is loud and creaky no matter how still I sit
with a desk that blocks my legs and ties me down.
I feel eyes hunting me as the classroom quiets down
and I suddenly feel like I’m breathing as loud as a tractor aimlessly roaming the fields.
The teacher looks over at me and the world turns dark,
my eyes are turning different colors like a high rainbow,
and my head spins like the beyblades I played with as a child did.
Everyone is expecting me to say something brilliant,
intelligent,
and perfect
as the teacher waits for me to answer, but my head goes completely blank.
I can’t think,
I can’t speak,
I can’t breathe.
I look around for help that’s nowhere to be found.
No superhero was going to sweep down and save me.
There are no magical unicorns from the cartoons I watched as a little kid to come to rescue me and tell me I’m the lost ruler of some ancient world.
So instead, I sit there as I feel an embarrassing tear sweep down my face.
A tear that to me, represents nothing but failure and immaturity.
My body weighs me down as I suddenly feel like I weigh 200 tons.
I stick to the chair and let my head fall as the room begins to close in.
I feel ready to give up, to slump into my chair and disappear into the darkness when I feel a hand touch my shoulder.
“You know the answer don’t you?” the random student asked.
I nod my head confused.
Raise your hand, go ahead.”The student smiled encouragingly, placing their hand on my shoulder
and suddenly I felt all the weight in my chest rise above the clouds.
I turned back to face the teacher, and steadily raised my hand,
Above my head,
Above the pain,
Above the shame.
Up into the air,
Free,
Calm,
Serene.
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